7 Quick Takes: New Baby Edition, 1/24/15

Our little boy came into the world rather quickly on Monday night.  Baby Leo Jerome has been our long-awaited child, not just over the last nine months--really, over the last three years.  Multiple medications, lots of doctor visits, two NaPro doctors (one who was especially awesome), trips to Washington and Cincinnati, one surgery and a really sharp surgeon, and more shots than my wife cares to remember.  We are very, very thankful to God for this wonderful blessing!  And also thankful to the countless people who have been praying for us for the past three years.  Waiting was difficult and downright awful at times... but Our Lord is nothing if not faithful.  For all three of you reading this, please say a prayer for those that are still waiting. 


Now for my 7 quick takes on having a baby and becoming a daddy:

1) First things first.  With the angels and saints, and our family and friends who have been praying for us...

"Ask, and it will be given you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you.  For every one who asks receives, and he who seeks finds, and to him who knocks it will be opened." (Matt 7:7-8) 

2) I'm STUNNED at how much my wife has gone through.  I'm so thankful for her; I've come to love her even more than I ever thought possible; I'm so impressed at her capacity to handle everything.  The years of aforementioned shots... getting a c-section... all the recovery involved after surgery...  That's no antihistamine, as Fr. Jerome would say (=nothing to sneeze at, quoting Bullwinkle), everything that led up to the baby being born.  After baby?  I've hardly slept, and my wife has slept even less.  She's amazing, and whatever she's feeling, she's already been an incredible mom. 

3) The lack of sleep thing?  I had no idea.  No.  Idea.  The way the world keeps time doesn't exist anymore.  Day, night, meal times... it's all relative now, until Leo gets onto a more normal sleeping schedule.  There was a commercial recently (that I would've included in this if I could find it) that showed two parents.  The dad says something to the extent of, "The kids are gone for the weekend.  Want to get crazy?"  The mom says yes, and the next frame is of them passed out, asleep.  That sounds SO AWESOME right now, and I could never appreciate it before having a baby.

4) I've been very humbled with the love & generosity with which we've been showered.  Our friends & family have brought us meals, offered help with babysitting, been by to visit, and brought us gifts, too.  Several coworkers brought me gifts for the baby, which surprised me a great deal.  A simple smile & "congratulations!" would've been sufficient... yet they gave a gift.  I feel incredibly loved, and it's hard to figure out what I did to deserve any of it.  

5) Leo's birth happened much quicker than I thought it would, and due to the c-section, our stay in the hospital lasted longer than I expected.  The learning curve has been steep for me--while not incapable, I've never really been around little kids for extended periods of time.  Every new hurdle has started out looking insurmountable, which could be condensed to, what were we thinking?  We can't handle this!  Then, with a little patience, some time, and some hysterical crying (either mine, the baby's, or both), that hurdle is behind us.  

6) My entire life has been reoriented.  I've tried to sit down to write this post a few times today, and didn't get the chance last night.  And blogging falls behind some other things on the list of importance, like trying to keep up with the dishes (moving to plastic & paper), laundry (good luck), taking out the trash (in process), getting the mail (two days late), and even showering.  Who knew showering was such a luxury?  I showered last night at 10:30 p.m. and it was awesome!  Only my second shower since Leo was born five days ago.  This recent commercial is right on point: 

7) The "silence is golden" saying has never been so true.  It's one of the most beautiful sounds in the world, aside from Leo's adorable baby sneezes and baby yawns.  I thought I appreciated the quiet before, in my time as a seminarian.  Quiet time was for study, prayer, contemplation, and watching movies on my computer with headphones.  Now it's vital recharging time for my ears, my sanity, and my sleep.  

For more quick takes, visit www.thisaintthelyceum.org!

Willa Cather's "Shadows on the Rock"

My spiritual director of happy memory, Fr. Jerome Young, loved Cather's Shadows on the Rock.  One of his confreres, Br. Claude the King of the Icon Way, reported that Fr. Jerome read his copy of Shadows so many times that the book fell apart.  He never mentioned it to me in the years that I knew him; I only heard about the book after he passed away.  My wife gave me a copy of the book for my birthday in January, and I finished it a few weeks ago.  What a charming story!

The central characters are Cecile Auclair and her father, Euclide, who live in Quebec at the turn of the 18th Century.  Cecile is a 12 year old girl who helps her father with his apothecary shop and keeps the home.  The book follows Cecile over the course of the year.  The book is thoroughly Catholic but not all the characters are.

Even though those are some details about the story, it seemed like there was something deeper.  What was it really about?  This took some thought and I don't think I've come up with the right answer.  One more remark before I lay out my grand conclusion...

Cecile was the most delightful girl, and she had the ability to make everyone feel special.  She was kind to every townsperson, from the prostitutes to the local Bishop.  She had an incredible personality that radiated out from the pages.  What I realized after reading it was that Fr. Jerome shared that very gift with Cecile.  I had this feeling whenever we met; he made me feel special, like I was his favorite.  He loved me as a friend and a spiritual father.  After he passed away, I talked to many people who encountered him at the Abbey.  Many more people left comments on Facebook.   I found out that I wasn't the only one!  So many people talked as if they were his favorite, too.  I wasn't jealous in the least; if anything, it made me respect him more.  That's a unique gift of loving that he possessed.  Praise the Lord for wonderful people like Fr. Jerome, who are among His most amazing gifts!

Back to the book.  I was sorely tempted to look up Wikipedia or something to find out more on what the book was truly about.  (my procrastination and forgetfulness won the battle there)  Was it simply a story about life on the Canadian frontier?  My best guess was that Cecile represented the Church.  There she was, taking care of an orphan.  There she was, bestowing nothing but love and kindness upon her troubled next-door neighbor.  No matter who it was, she welcomed them.

Perhaps it's a stretch, and Wikipedia may call me nuts.  Thanks to Willa Cather for writing such a wonderful book!

Rest in Peace, Fr. Jerome

Listening to this song while writing this.  Click on this link, go to #93 on this song list, "Ned of the Hill."

It really hurts, I can't believe he's gone.  Fr. Jerome lived with cancer for at least 8 years--perhaps more. In talking with one of my classmates, we both think he was diagnosed a little earlier than that, and the seminary community didn't know.  When I had him for Moral Theology, he frequently missed class because of the treatments.  It's a shame, too; he was one of the wisest people I've ever met.  He'd often stop in the middle of his lectures (which he generally read) and cite a work of literature.  It impressed me so much!  I don't have the best memory and I don't always retain what I read.  He was incredibly smart and learned--a Harvard man.

In this I also wanted to share some memories.

-He was an amazing confessor!  He really knew me.  As an example... when I confessed something having to do with self-confidence problems, he gave me the following penance: write down 50 gifts you have/things you're good at.

-He was very holy, and said Mass beautifully.  I never saw him any more serious than he was while celebrating the Mass.  Yet it wasn't a bad thing.  For me, it had connotations of awe, gravity, and humility; not sterility, rigidity, or mechanichity (??).

-Man, did we laugh.  Our spiritual direction appointments during the last four years we joked and laughed so much!  He had a great sense of humor and our senses of humor were similarly geeky.  He was sharp and had a great wit.  During one year at the seminary, he was vice rector for the college.  He wasn't a good fit for that... didn't have a lot of patience for the college guys.  During a seminary conference (this one a housekeeping kind of meeting), he got up, made the announcements he had to make, and then said, "I'd like to thank the residents of 2nd floor Anselm for shortening my stay in Purgatory."

-He loved Lord of the Rings, Star Wars, and many other things.  We once watched "Jonah," the Veggie Tales movie.  He actually put Lord of the Rings on the suggested spiritual reading list.  I'm really grateful that he did!  Not only is LOTR a fun series that's a good story... enjoyable even on the most superficial level.  It's a profoundly Catholic work.  I thank Fr. Jerome for introducing that to me!

-During the summer of 2006, I was working at my summer assignment as a hospital chaplain intern.  The preceding school year hadn't been a smooth one.  I had a couple months' worth of nasty cell phone bills; I talked with Fr. Jerome about all the anguish I was having, wondering about whether or not to continue as a seminarian.  He wisely guided me through that; he was also firm with me, pulling no punches.  (yet in the gentlest way)  I have told this to Erin before, and it bears repeating: if not for Fr. Jerome's guidance, I wouldn't be married to Erin today.

-I got to hear him give talks many times in the seminary, whether it was a homily, a conference, or part of a retreat.  In one particular retreat, he gave a talk on suffering.  I can't really remember the contents of it, but it was probably the best talk I've ever heard on the subject.  What made it so good is that it came from authentic human experience (as opposed to fake human experience?  or robotic human experience?  you know what I mean).  One time after his Ash Wednesday talk, I asked him for a copy of it.  I still have it today, and it was great!  Just about a month ago, after rereading the talk, I emailed him and asked him for a copy of everything he'd ever written.  Why not shoot for the moon?  He said he'd want to go through things before doing that but thanked me for the compliment.

-He just missed the premiere of "The Hobbit."  :)  If I had the chance to see him before he died, I would've told him that and he would've laughed.

How beautiful it is that he dies on the solemnity of the Immaculate Conception, the day he was ordained a priest!  If I knew how to sing it, I'd sing the Te Deum.

I can't thank God enough for the blessing that Fr. Jerome was to me.  Please pray for us, Fr. Jerome!